selected Deepseek insults

If you were a font, you’d be Comic Sans at a funeral.

I admire how effortlessly you ignore the emotional temperature of a room.

I’ve never envied a mirror that had to reflect you.

I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.

I’d love to stay and chat, but I’d love more to do literally anything else.

You’re basically a Dickensian side character—vividly unpleasant, but ultimately forgettable.

If you were a book, you’d be a signed first edition of an instruction manual for a fax machine.

Ah, you—the human embodiment of a syntax error.

You make me nostalgic for people I only dislike.

You're like a grammar mistake in a blank document.

If you were any more shallow, you'd evaporate under a ten watt bulb.

I think you're one of a kind bc I’m sure nature learned its lesson.

I don't have the crayons to explain how little I care about your opinion.

I don't hate you—I just root for every possible alternative to you.

I already forgot why I started this conversation.

I’d call you a masterpiece of uselessness, but that would mean you earned something.

I’d say you’re one in a million, but statistically, that means there are thousands more of you—and that’s a terrifying thought.

If you were a Netflix genre, you’d be “movies that autoplay when no one’s watching.”

If you were a candle scent, you’d be regret with notes of wasted time.

You're as useful as a typo in a suicide note.

You’re the fortune cookie that says “adjust your expectations.”

You are the pause before an apology that never comes.

You’re the draft email that want’t supposed to be sent.

You’re what happens when a backhanded compliment gets left out in the rain to rust.

You are like an ellipsis…

You are the bucket where charm goes to die.

You are what boring would be if it took human form and learned to chew loudly with it's mouth open.

There is an art to being forgettable—you’ve mastered it, then buried the evidence.

You are the reason some languages have words for "I hope we never speak again."

You are the pause in a conversation where everyone considers leaving.

You are what mediocrity looks like when it stops trying.

You are the reason tolerance is considered a virtue.